5 Things I’ll Never Do As A Runner

“Never will I ever” and “never say never” are two phrases I hear fairly often. I hate to say never, because times and situations are always in flux, but I know myself and my boundaries. Truth is, I’m up for a lot of things, but there are just a few that are firmly in the camp of “no.”

I Will NEVER Run An Inflatable Race

Listen. Bouncing is fun. But trying to speed through a bounce house race course? That’s an injury just waiting to happen. In addition, those bounce structures get hot, and it just doesn’t feel super sanitary to have people sweating over and touching the same surfaces. Not my jam.

You’ll NEVER Catch Me At A Mud Run

Friends, I can barely handle rain. Mud is just next level of nastiness as far as I am concerned. While I recognize that mud runs are probably super fun and a great bonding experience, the idea of being saturated in wet dirt makes my blood run cold. And while I’m not necessarily a germaphobe, there are way too many stories of runners getting sick from weird pathogens and bacteria in the mud. Count me out.

NEVER Will I Ever Take On A Bubble Run

Once again, safety comes to mind. Those bubbles are slick and slippery, and I don’t need any extra help getting injured. When the weather is nice, bubble runs offer a super vibe and the chance to get incredible pictures, but then you’re dealing with all that soapy foam going everywhere. I’ll pass.

You’ll NEVER Find Me At Another Marathon

Truth. As much as I say I would run the NYC Marathon, I really don’t think I would. Twenty-six point two miles is a long one and I’ve ben there, done that. I’m at peace with that.

And Finally, I Will NEVER Attempt One Of Those Super Ultras.

I know my limits. Could I take on a 30K? Probably? 50 miles? 100? Nah. I imagine if there was a super generous time limit, I could maybe be talked into it, but I’d truly just rather do a relay. Long distance running is hard on my ankle. I hate carrying gear and supplies. And I’m not sure the juice is worth the squeeze for me. I’m always in for a day or three of hiking, but my ultra time has passed. I would love to hear all about yours, though!

What are some things you would never do as a runner?

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