riots #11: the rainbow bridge + moving forward


Happy Monday! I hope you’ll join us for the #RIOTS (Running Is Our Therapy Sisters) link up every week on Mondays. We’d love to be a part of your weekly routine!

Set some goals, share them on your blog and then link up with other awesome fitness bloggers to help keep you on track! We’d all love to support you!

We had to say goodbye to our sweet Molly pug this week. As much as I wanted (and needed) her to live forever, it wasn’t in the cards, and we were able to let her go to the rainbow bridge quietly, peacefully and with so much love. I would be lying if I said I was ok. I’m not sleeping well – every night I wake up multiple times, reaching to pet her ears, and every time, I’m devastated to find her not there. It will take time, but all our hearts feel so very broken.

Sunday – 7 miles, running

The weather was nice and cool and made seven miles go fairly smoothly.

When I got home, the guys were just waking up and Molly was not well at all. We were supposed to go meet my brother-in-law and nephews at the beach, but there was absolutely no way I was leaving her alone for the day. I sent the boys on their way and spent the whole day with her.

She was no longer interested in her food, but she was quite happy eating junk food – the vet had given the ok o that, so she enjoyed half a cheeseburger, some scrambled eggs and Mr PugRunner brought home a Puppacino from Starbucks as an extra special treat.

Monday – rest

I spent another day with our sweet girl. Mr PR called the vet again, and we discussed him coming to the house at lunch on Friday so we could let her go. For those of you who are pet owners, you know that this is the hardest, kindest thing in the world. We resolved to just love on her and snuggle her and let her go peacefully.

Tuesday – 6.5 miles, running

I was happy to run in the morning. It helped relieve some stress and anxiety, even on three hours of sleep. Molly had rested comfortably all night but I woke up and didn’t want to stop petting her.

Little man got some wonderful time with her before school. She loved him so much, and vice versa.

We had told my parents about the appointment, in the event they wanted to say goodbye. They came that morning for a nice visit, and gave her goodbye hugs and kisses.

And despite our plans, she was ready. Not ten minutes after my parents left, her breathing became very labored and we knew we had to do the right thing by her. Our vet and his staff are so incredible – he and one of the techs came straight over, talked us through the process, and she crossed to the Rainbow Bridge quietly, while laying in my arms.

Telling little man was awful. We had to keep reminding him she was no longer in pain and she was with Oscar and all the other awesome pups in dog heaven, but we are all still feeling the giant hole in our hearts.

Wednesday – rest

We decided to send little man to school since it was a short day, hoping he could keep his mind busy and off his sadness (it was the right call). Mr PR and I both worked from home. It was important to stay occupied, but motivation was in short supply.

Thursday – 6 miles, running

This run was hard. My body still felt so beat up and tired. I was running on very little sleep and hydration has been abysmal. But we managed and S let me cry and vent and get it all out.

I spent the day cleaning and doing laundry. We had been going through tons of blankets and towels in the last months, and I needed to get through the backlog.

In the evening, I went to Scouts and little man went to basketball practice. He was doing well keeping with his regularly scheduled activities.

Fridayrest

I did a little volunteering at school in the morning. Following that, I put together swag bags and picked up drinks and snacks for a lunch at one of the other local elementary schools. One of my clients was hosting a reward meal for 14 students and I was on hand to help facilitate.

In the evening, I met two of my friends for drinks and to celebrate one of their birthdays. I wasn’t sure about it, but it was good to get myself out of the house and I was glad they were patient with me and encouraged me to come out.

Mr PR and little man popped the pugs in the wagon and walked them down to our neighborhood’s Food Truck Friday. Apparently, they loved it, especially getting some pieces of chicken as a reward. They deserved some fun after the last week, too.

Saturday – 3 miles, running

S was out late on Friday and texted me to see if I would mind skipping. I didn’t, mostly. However, I did some calculations to see that if I managed three miles on Saturday, with my March To Get Screened 5K on Sunday, I would log 100 miles for March, and I couldn’t turn that down.

Little man had basketball, and I was finally able to get a picture of him in his uniform. I love it. (PS – this week’s game went much better for everyone).

In the afternoon, we parted ways. The boys went to the last home Icemen game of the season. They scored tons of swag and Mr PugRunner won a game worn jersey at auction, which he then got signed.

On the other hand, I headed to the St. Augustine Distillery for their 5th Anniversary. We have honestly never been, although we have enjoyed their spirits in craft cocktails around town, and I was very happy to check it out. Guests could sample cocktails (my favorite was the Florida Mule), order dinner from the With A Twist Food Truck, listen to live music, and taste goodies from local shops. We will definitely be back for an actual tour and tasting.

I did get in just over 100 miles for the month, which puts me almost at 300 for the year. I’m feeling very happy about that.

Cooking was a huge struggle this week. I didn’t have any interest in making anything, letting alone be creative about it. I put out ground beef for tacos one night, and then lost all motivation for making them, so I ended up with this Cheeseburger Pasta Skillet.

It was filling and comforting and easy to make, and that was really all I could ask for.

I’m ready to get back to reading but I haven’t really found anything that’s moved me. I need to get better about that.

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I am also linking up with the new Weekly Rundown, with Confessions of A Mother Runner and Running on the Fly! Check them out!

How was your week in training?

How do you recover from the loss of a beloved pet?

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30 Responses to riots #11: the rainbow bridge + moving forward

  1. Kim G says:

    I’m so sorry about the loss of Molly 🙁 It’s so hard to see our fur babies go because they really are family.

    Great job with your monthly mileage for March!

  2. Laurie says:

    I am so sorry about the loss of Molly. Dogs just work their way into our hearts, don’t they? They become part of the family. Out Benji is now 13 years old and I can’t believe he is a senior citizen in dog years!

    Your visit to the distillery sound like a lot of fun! A Florida mule is very appealing!
    Laurie recently posted…Runfessions – MarchMy Profile

    • runswithpugs says:

      Thank you so much. Pets are such a huge part of my world – I can’t imagine a life without a bunch of sweet animals.

      The distillery is really cool. I want to go back.

  3. Wendy says:

    Every time someone loses a pet, I go back to that sad place when we had to let Cleo go. I’ve lost a few dogs and it was sad every time, but Cleo’s passing really got me. I think because it happened out of the blue and so fast. One minute she was begging for Cheerios and a few hours later, moaning in her crate. I took her to the ER vet and her labs were all out of whack. The next morning, I took her back and they did an ultrasound, finding a kidney tumor. We made the only decision that we could. Matthew was with me. It was just the saddest thing and took me forever to get over. Like you, I kept reaching for her at night to pet her. Mike finally convinced me to get another dog and we got Cocoa. You know I love her with all my heart but it’s not the same. There’s always that one dog… anyways, I send you empathy and hugs. Dog owners–we get each other!

    • runswithpugs says:

      Oh, that breaks my heart.

      I was lost without Oscar, and now lost again with Molly. I am not ready for another dog right now, but I do feel like I can open up to a puppy. Molly was 14 and I had her since she was 8 weeks old. I knew her parents and played with her littermates. I love rescuing, but I want to raise a wee puppy again. I don’t know how Mr PugRunner is going to be about this, but I feel our family needs it.

      We do get each other.<3

  4. I’m so sorry about your dog. What a tough week! Losing a pet is so heartbreaking. 🙁
    Lisa @ TechChick Adventures recently posted…GCM training recap, wk 13 – snow and large crittersMy Profile

  5. So sorry about your dear Molly’s passing. I was with my sister, a few years back, when she made that same decision for her dog (who was 14ish years and had been struggling for several months). It was heart-wrenching. I hope all of the wonderful memories you have with Molly bring you some comfort. Hugs to you <3

  6. So sorry for the loss of your dog. It must be comforting to know how much she was loved and vice versa. Wow you sure did log a lot of miles this month! I do not think I could ever run that much in one month. My body would hate me.Thanks for linking up
    Deborah Brooks recently posted…Weekly Run Down A Sunshine and Flowers kind of weekMy Profile

    • runswithpugs says:

      Thank you for the kind words.

      I felt good with the miles this month. I’ve been consistent and careful, pushing when it feels right and holding back when it doesn’t. So far, so good.

  7. I’m so sorry about Molly. There’s never enough time with them. I’m glad everyone is pulling through.
    That photo of the two in the wagon is the cutest thing ever.
    Congratulations on 100 miles this month! That’s fantastic!
    Stacie Seidman recently posted…Favorite Finds… on Friday!My Profile

    • runswithpugs says:

      OMG Never enough. I would do anything for another day with her. 🙁

      Delilah and Bentley are being so good. They are getting along nicely and behaving themselves. Not that they aren’t good pugs, but they are definitely being a bit more reserved this week.

  8. Darlene says:

    I am always amazed at how many miles you squeeze in during the work week. I am lucky if I can run 3.

    Again sorry about the loss of Molly. It’s so hard to lose a pet. We had 2 cats die in one year.

  9. Renée says:

    Jenn, I am so very sorry for your loss. Reading about Molly going over the rainbow bridge just brought tears to my eyes. It wasn’t that long ago that I was reduced to a snotty, mascara-stained mess having to let go of Elvis. It hurts so much to lose our pets. They are a part of our family, they are our babies. I still see Elvis in the house and then I have to shake my head and tell myself, no, he’s not here anymore.

    It’s good that you tried to move on a bit with your daily lives, running and even having a little bit of fun.

    big extra cuddly hugs to you all. I hope Molly found Elvis – I bet they are playing with each other right now xx

    • runswithpugs says:

      Sweet Elvis 🙁 I hope Molly found him, too. If I know my girl, she is raising hell all over the place, playing with all the other pets and having so much fun. That doesn’t make it hurt any less, but I’m glad she isn’t suffering.

  10. Oh man! I am so sorry to hear about Molly. Your post made me cry. I had a cat that was very sick too and I had the option to put her to sleep at the vet. I chose to bring her home and to spend as much time as possible with here. It was hard.

    • runswithpugs says:

      🙁 It’s just so hard to know what the right decision is. And, at the end of the day, I admit to being terribly selfish and wanting to keep her always. That’s not how it works, of course, but we can always hope. I’m sorry about your kitty.

  11. Jenn I am just so sorry about Molly. Our pets become such a very special part of our hearts and lives…saying goodbye is never easy.

    Lots of hugs to you my friend.

  12. When I am majorly stressed — in the same situation you sadly found yourself in, for instance — I totally lose my appetite. I have to force myself to eat. And it’s just physically and mentally exhausting even if you are sleeping. Big,big hugs. You made the right choice, and I’m so glad you were able to spend so much time with Molly towards the end.

    • runswithpugs says:

      I generally don’t have much of an appetite, but I do force myself to eat because I end up making myself super weak and sick if I don’t. I’m glad we were able to spend so much time together too. I miss her so much.

  13. Esther says:

    My heart has been aching with you since I saw the news. She was oh so loved. I know she is so missed and I am glad you were able to spend so much time with her in the end. It is never easy to lose those sweet pups that we love.
    I know it is hard, but I am glad you were able to get in some runs, vent about the stress and have some good family time.
    Sending all the love and hugs!
    Esther recently posted…What happened to March?My Profile

  14. Cari says:

    Your pup was beautiful. So sad, so hard. Hope you continue to navigate
    Sorry I keep forgetting to linkup with yOU 🙁
    Cari recently posted…Running and ReadingMy Profile

  15. Coco says:

    I’m so sorry about Molly. You’re right that it’s the hardest and kindest thing to do — it is such an act of love. How sweet that your parents came by to same good bye. We had some good-bye visits for Tiger Lilly when her time was drawing near a few years ago.
    Coco recently posted…Running In Brickell MiamiMy Profile

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